Nevy! Hi!

I feel REAAAALLY bad about the whole 'assuming you were dating Witherby' thing. And I could tell you were getting overwhelmed trying to figure out if you even liked him like that on your own...

So!

I thought maybe I could help you out like I do with Training research?

I've attached ALL the stuff I could find on bisexuality and how to tell if you are and all that, and I figure you can do your thing to it and figure out what parts actually matter?

Love (but not that way!)

Devy

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How To Tell If You (Neville) are Bisexual (for Witherby).

by Devona [REDACTED]

Reach: This Document Should Be For Your (Neville's) Eyes Only And Not For Anyone Else (Besides Me, Devona, Who Can't Write This Blind, Ha Ha).

Risks and Opportunities: Reading This Document Risks You (Neville) Finding Out You are Bisexual (for Witherby). The Opportunity Is Also That You (Neville) Might Find Out You are Bisexual (for Witherby).

Executive Summary: ((Nevy, I'm gonna leave this blank 'till you work your magic in your editing pass, k?))

Research:

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/bisexual

of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to people of one's same sex and of the opposite sex
of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to people of one's own gender identity and of other gender identities
biology : possessing characters of both sexes and especially both male and female reproductive structures : HERMAPHRODITIC

https://kinseyinstitute.org/research/publications/kinsey-scale.php

"The Kinsey team interviewed thousands of people about their sexual histories. Research showed that sexual behavior, thoughts, and feelings towards the same or opposite sex were not always consistent across time. Instead of assigning people to three categories-heterosexual, bisexual, and homosexual-the team used a seven-point scale. It ranges from 0 to 6 with an additional category of "X.""

https://kinseyinstitute.org/research/publications/historical-report-diversity-of-sexual-orientation.php

"Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948) and Sexual Behavior in the Human Female (1953) reported that:

37% of males and 13% of females had at least some overt homosexual experience to orgasm;
10% of males were more or less exclusively homosexual and 8% of males were exclusively homosexual for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. For females, Kinsey reported a range of 2-6% for more or less exclusively homosexual experience/response.
4% of males and 1-3% of females had been exclusively homosexual after the onset of adolescence up to the time of the interview.

Kinsey devised a classification scheme to measure sexual orientation. It is commonly known as the Kinsey Scale"

"Janus and Janus, in their cross-sectional (not random) nationwide survey of American adults aged 18 and over, stated that 9% of men and 5% of women reported having had homosexual experiences "frequently" or "ongoing." In another measure, 4% of men and 2% of women self-identified as homosexual. The authors used a questionnaire, supplemented by 125 interviews (4,550 questionnaires were distributed, 3,260 were returned, and 2,765 were usable)."

"Data collected from a national sample of 13,495 men and women between 2006 and 2008. The study attempted to differentiate between sexual attraction, sexual behavior, and sexual identity. The percentage reporting their sexual identity as homosexual ranged from 2% to 4% of males, and about 1% to 2% of females. The percentage reporting their sexual identity as bisexual is between 1% and 3% of males, and 2% to 5% of females. About 4%–6% of males ever had same-sex contact. For females, the percentage who have ever had same-sex contact ranges from about 4% in the GSS, to 11%–12% in the 2002 and 2006–2008 NSFG."

https://academic.oup.com/sf/article/97/3/1067/5045222

"Why do nationally representative surveys show that are there more men and women who acknowledge same-sex attractions and/or sexual practices than who identify as LGBQ (Copen, Chandra, and Febo-Vazquez 2016; Ward et al. 2014)? First, sexual orientation and sexual identity differ. Sexual orientation includes emotional attractions and sexual attractions, practices, desires, and fantasies (Savin-Williams 2014). Each element is related but distinct (Priebe and Svedin 2013). Aspects of orientation do not always cluster in ways suggested by common sexual identities."

"A small base of qualitative research seeks to understand why some individuals with same-sex attractions and/or practices identify as LGBQ, whereas others identify as straight. "

https://www.insider.com/guides/health/sex-relationships/biromantic

"Biromantic describes the capacity to be romantically attracted to more than one gender."

"Being biromantic doesn't necessarily mean you're sexually attracted to people of different genders."

https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a39431976/biromantic-meaning/

"People often say "bisexual" when they're referring to both romantic and sexual attraction, but technically, it's a way of labeling who you're down to hop in the sheets with-and that doesn't always align with who you're romantically attracted to. For example, someone might be sexually interested in people of one gender, but romantically interested in multiple genders."

" In real life, someone might be happily dating a partner they're not sexually into, but whom they love deeply. "

"The first step is knowing what romantic feelings feel like, and how to distinguish them from sexual and platonic feelings-which can be tricky. "

""Such activities include (but are not limited to) snuggling, holding hands, going on romantic dates, exchanging romantic words, sharing a bed, [and] being in a committed relationship," she says. She explains these activities will feel different from how they would with someone you want platonic intimacy with."

"Ultimately, you get to decide how you identify. Figuring out who you are can take time, and that's OK! Try to not be too hard on yourself or rush the process."

"Don't be afraid to ask questions, but also make it a priority to do your own (responsibly sourced) research."

https://www.healthline.com/health/am-i-bisexual

"But it can also be discombobulating. According to certified dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg, though, a sex dream alone isn't reason enough to get your panties in a bunch about your sexuality."

""The only time a sex dream may give you some inclination about your sexual orientation is if before you had the dream you were already questioning your sexuality," she says."

"So, no quiz can tell you whether you're bisexual.

(And any quiz that claims to be able to tell your sexuality is full of sh*t!)."

"Only you can determine whether bisexual feels like a label that best fits you,"

Bisexual activist Shiri Eisner, author of "Bi: Notes For A Revolution," suggests asking yourself the following questions to determine if you're bisexual:

Does the term bisexual give me a sense of comfort?

Does the term bisexual give me a sense of adventure?

Is it fun for me to think about being bisexual?

Does the thought of being bisexual or identifying as bisexual make me happy?

Does it make me feel good about myself?

Does the term bisexuality give me a sense of challenge?

Does it give me community? Or support?

Does it give me anything else I'm after?

If you answered yes to any of the above, she says: "Just use it. You're absolutely valid."

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a27574705/am-i-bisexual/

"The thing that makes bisexuality great is also what makes it kinda tragic: Bisexuality is subversive and hard to pin down, which means it's sometimes hard to actually see. It doesn't fit neatly into categories or binaries, but instead, transcends them. So there aren't exactly rules about what makes a person bisexual-you just sort of know it when you feel it."

"If you're looking for a general definition of what it means to be bisexual, the Human Rights Campaign defines it as feelings of romantic or sexual attraction to more than one gender (meaning it could be more than two!). Where things can get murky, though, is when those feelings for multiple genders don't occur simultaneously, in the same way, or to the same degree, which Seattle-based relationship, intimacy, and sex therapist Claudia Johnson says is very common. That mismatch of feelings can sometimes contribute to hostility or disbelief from others about a bisexual person's true desires, or whether their sexuality is "just a phase" (eye roll) or an attempt to be "trendy" (double eye roll)."

"That's not to say that as a bisexual person you won't spend hours, if not years, of your life questioning your sexuality and wondering if you really are one thing or another-gay, straight, or maybe something else entirely. But maybe all that questioning is part of the fun. Or at least a necessary step on the path to enlightenment, or whatever it is you're going for."

"There were some inklings and vibes for a while, but it didn't feel like it became a fact until I was supposed to be meeting someone for drinks and found myself truly flustered for the first time in a long time."

"She would kiss people as a joke and I secretly hoped she would try to kiss me."

Resources: